On connection: My little brother, Cody, and his beautiful wife, Leah, were married on the beach in San Pancho, Mexico. They were surrounded by a loving audience of their closest friends and family who joyfully shook maracas and cheered with each person who walked down the palm covered sand. It was SO FUN!
Nature was present so beauty and love were as well.
I was honored to officiate. Here is a small bit of what I shared at the wedding. It's my favorite part and was written by my husband, Cliff. “People embody five basic elements of life: Fire, water, earth, nature and mineral. Individuals are born embodying one of these elements as their essence and carrying the rest at a variety of levels as support elements. No one can be just one element without the presence of the other four.
But your essence element is part of your genius.
Your destiny is to allow your genius to come out wrapped in the colors of your character. A person like Leah, who takes care of others - be it humans plants or animals and accepts them as they are, embodies earth element.
A person like Cody, with great social skills, who is always drawn to connect with others and who holds the stories of others in his bones, embodies mineral element.
Separately earth and mineral are powerful. But mineral must be grounded in earth in order to nourish the living. And earth must be given structure by mineral or it will give of itself too generously, and collapse. This is part of the magic of these two choosing each other."❤️ I hope as you're reading this today you remember your own genius and how completely necessary you are in the balance of things. Squeeze your partner who is such a powerful mirror for you, whisper gratitude to your beloved pet who grounds you like none other, call your best friend and tell them what you adore about their essence.
We are all in this together. Love each other up out there.
I love you.
Imperfect Perfection
Hi! It’s 2 am and I riding the jet lag waves. Laying here scrolling through images of our trip. This one was an accidental model moment Fr the mud bath in Da Nang, Vietnam — and I’ll take it!
We decided to come home earlier than planned so that I could have a surgery on my airway. And the thing is I’ve just been immersed in months of sincere and active healing work ON my airway.
In one view I could be super disappointed that the stuff I’ve been up to didn’t work OR I could choose to see the perfection in how this is all playing out. What if all my efforts in the Far East helped to serve up the scar tissue so that my doc can now scoop it out and clear the way for a good long time?
Point is, always leave room for the miracle. Release the need to judge the process. Foster a belief that life is happening for you.
Pursuit Of Alignment
When I complete a journal I go back and read it. I consider this an act of respect and remembering for the person I was when I started it and who I’ve become as the pages turned. This is where I get my journal page posts from. They are real pages in my journal that were/ are notes to self.
I completed a journal en route to Bali which felt exactly perfect. This page felt like it wanted to be shared. It’s reads, “Please help to align what is misaligned. A brave ask.” I hope some aspect of it speaks to you.
More than anything lately I’m clear on one thing - I work with energy (actually we all do, all the time). But specifically, in my work, I move through creating sacred and safe space. Together through a united, clear intention we begin to manipulate the subtle energies of the body.
It’s in this space that whatever was misaligned receives help and attention to once again become aligned. I find this to be an incredibly brave thing to do.
And yet there comes a point when it would be more painful to stay the same than the work it would take to change.
The bravery comes in because the process of moving back into alignment is FILLED with the unknown. Moving back into alignment may be a straightforward task like screwing your sunglasses stem (is that what they’re called?) back on. OR it could be something else entirely... you may not know where the screw went even though you remember wearing the glasses in one piece at some point. You may have to get new glasses all together... (you’re getting this metaphor right?) coming back into alignment holds so many variables. And with that so many sensations, emotions and experiences. In asking for alignment we trust that whatever it takes to move towards it is a worth while pursuit. I believe it is.
Understanding Together
“Some Hindus have an elephant to show.
No one here has ever seen an elephant.
They bring it at night to a dark room.
One by one, we go in the dark and come out saying how we experience the animal. One of us happens to touch the trunk. A water-pipe kind of creature.
Another, the ear. A strong, always moving back and forth, fan-animal. Another, the leg. I find it still, like a column on a temple.
Another touches the curve back. A leathery throne. Another, the cleverest, feels the tusk. A rounded sword made of porcelain. He is proud of his description.
Each of us touches one place
and understands the whole in that way.
The palm and the fingers feeling in the dark
are how the senses explore the reality of the elephant.
If each of us held a candle there,
and if we went in together, we could see it.”
- Rumi
Seeing the whole with great reverence. Best experience ever! 🐘
Silence & Healing
Yesterday was a magic day!
Surgery on my trachea was a huge success and these last three procedures in quick succession did exactly what we hoped. A more gentle approach over time has led to my airway being bigger than it's been in 14 years! This is huge for me and my breather!
I posted here in stories as I was headed to the hospital yesterday and want to thank you all for your kind words and positive thoughts of a wide open airway! I believe in the power of combining our energies into a clear intention. And it was definitely heard!
Over all these years I've developed a practice of thanking the group of people in the OR and exuberantly telling them to have fun! There's always a giggle that moves through the room and then I'm out. I love this practice as it covers the bases by speaking words of gratitude and lightening the mood.
Today I'm in silence (part of the recovery process) and about the work of moving the anesthesia out of my body. If I'm being honest all those drugs are really fun for like 5-7 minutes and after that it's all temporary amnesia, seemingly endless dry mouth and constipation. But oh those few minutes.
No complaints here. I'm just going to sit here in copious amounts of salt and magnesium and healing flowers and soak while I continue the silent disco that is happening inside my head. I love breathing and I love you!
There IS Magic In You
I was lovingly accused of possessing magical abilities over the holiday and Cliff and I have been unpacking the conversation. What was only a momentary remark has become a beautiful vessel for clarity. Here's where I've landed:
Many (if not most) humans are living in a five sensory experience. In a nut shell I guide myself and others from the sixth-sense, that place of intuition in your heart space. I listen to messages from my soul and my Higher Self. I get really quiet and ask sincerely to see the unseen, to experience alignment of what has become misaligned, to understand what I need to know right now for my highest good. This is a practice. It may seem magical to some but to me it is a skill that we uncover when we follow our intuition. And it is a power that we all share.
I take full credit for answering the call. It was a conscious decision and a choice I continue to make. And if you're here reading this perhaps YOU are being guided to tune and hone your intuition.
Here's one way to begin. Get curious about your emotions and why things are impacting you. Trace your reactions back to their origin. Learn how to let energy move through and out of your body. And if you find yourself in a toxic place (physically, emotionally or spiritually) learn how to identify what has become blocked inside. Removing blocks = eliminating toxicity.
I use meditation, breath, visualization, detoxifying foods, changed beliefs, clear intentions and verbal processing to remove blockages and invite lightness. And certainly some of the things I've seen have felt like straight up magic but I know the truth is they were willing to do the work to move energy and clean up the home of their soul (aka the body). I believe intuition is connection. I believe when we become aware of non-physical reality we come into our own ---- and happiness or job satisfaction or having a love in your life or whatever you desire is no longer such an elusive thing.
Worthy Mess
I’m back from my annual practice of a month-long unplug to recharge and it’s so good to be here. Thank you for every single loving comment and post about Ned. I am so grateful for this community space and for your love.
Here’s the truth - sometimes a bath ingredients photo like this would get a tidy little self-care hash tag, the heart eyes emoji and probably a whole bunch of likes. BUT there’s so much more to self-care and I appreciate that we are having those conversations more and more here (and in places like Self-Care Sanctuary with Kelly Rae and me). Self-care is often messy, hard and will sometimes take you down like a spiritual flu!
So while I did things on my month off that are considered mainstream self-care like baths, soaking in hot springs and reading. I also did what my body commanded and laid in bed and writhed in pain after unexpectedly unearthing decades old trauma. Self-care became eating saltines and praying for reprieve. Self-care was sobbing unmercifully in the shower and literally digging a hole in the ground to lay in (I'll say more about that soon). I followed the energy, I tried to remember that it was necessary to trust the process, I let myself wallow and I also saw the bigger picture when it was time to.
What I hope to convey most is that it's ok to be in process and it's ok for it to look like what it is going to look like for you. There is no one way. Your mess is worthy. Sacred even.
Keep going. I love you. Lacy
Dear Ned,
Four years ago my friend, @thetiffanyhan , asked me what I wanted most in my business but was afraid to do. My reply was to take some time off. I longed for a month off each year to both meditate my brains out and remember what it is to play. She looked at me and said, "Lace, you can totally do that!" Together we mapped out what my upcoming year would look like and I stuck to it!
This is my third year to take time away from screens. No phone. No computer. On October 1st (tomorrow!!!) they'll be powered down and go into a drawer so I may power up.
It's never the same month, or at least it hasn't been so far. I listen to my intuition in the planning stages of everything, especially what a calendar year will look like for my work in the world. This year the break was planned for October and I think Ned knew that.
More than anything this coming month I'm going to grieve his loss. I'm going into silence to commune with my Higher Self and all her wisdom. I'm going put pen to page and see what comes. I'm going into our woods to learn from the trees and ask for their support.
It feels fitting that the Self-Care Sanctuary will officially begin the day I go into my most beloved self-care practice. @kellyraeroberts will be with you throughout the month and I'll see you all at the LIVE Q+R if you've enrolled.
Thank you for holding me in light as you always do.
I love you,
Lacy
Ned kitty July 2000 - September 2018
Dear Ned,
You were unexpected. The day we met you were so tiny but already such an excellent communicator. I understood you immediately when your eyes said, "Take me home, ok?"
That first day I scooped you up in my palm I knew my entire life was about to change. And it did. When I held you in my arms as you left your body I experienced that feeling once again. And everything has changed.
I was always in awe of your patience. It took me a moment to get used to being owned by a cat but sweet boy, you were the best thing I never knew I needed. Even as you grew older and were negotiating blindness you were so patient with yourself and with us. Cliff moved the foot stool yesterday and it seemed so wrong. It's strange to not have everything in it's place so you can get around with ease. I notice your absence everywhere.
I was 21 years old when you chose me and 39 the day you transitioned. You were with me through some of the most gigantic chapters life has to offer and you were unwavering in your love. Except maybe for that year in the RV, I know that one was a challenge. Life at the cabin was the healing antidote we all needed and I am grateful that this is your resting place.
I miss you sitting in my lap for hours on end while I work. I miss the hilarious crunching sounds of you and Cliff eating Fritos. I miss the way you played in the sheets as we made the bed. I miss hearing your heartbeat in my pillow as you lay between us each night. I miss the way you would scoot closer to make sure we were touching. I miss seeing you and Cliff laying out together in the warmth of the sun. I miss the way you'd stand up on your back legs and put your front two paws on my shoulder in anticipation of being picked up. I miss everything about having you in my life.
I hope you've found Uncle Todd in The Oneness. You two would love each other. I hope you feel unlimited and free.
It is an honor to get to love you so much and I will forever
Your Sanctuary Has Arrived
#selfcarewithlacyandkellyrae
I have BIG NEWS that I have been aching to share with you for months now, and today is finally the day!! I feel like a kid on Christmas morning barreling down the stairs towards undeniable joy.
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Today I am officially opening the doors to the Self-Care Sanctuary with my dear friend and collaborator Kelly Rae Roberts, and I cannot wait for you to step inside with me!
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So what is The Self-Care Sanctuary, you ask?
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Well, above all, it is the answer to something so many of you have been asking for. Those of you who have graduated from Soul Care and have been thirsty to keep the momentum alive. Those of you who have experienced Shift and have been craving to stay connected. Those of you who have followed me here and have wanted access to the magic.
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Welcome to your answer. Welcome to the Self-Care Sanctuary.
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The Self-Care Sanctuary is an online sacred space that offers ongoing inspiration and nourishment to women who want to strengthen their self-care and soul-care practices as a way into deeper ease, more joy, and simple abundance.
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We're talking new, soul-stirring content each month. Spine-tingling meditations. Live, no-bullshit conversations. Inspirational soul-mantra art. And more. So much more. This is a love offering straight from my heart to yours and I'm so. freaking. excited.
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I know how badly you want to keep the work alive in your lives. I've heard you again and again in your desire to stay connected to yourself, to each other, to me.
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So with the fullest heart you can imagine, I invite you into the Self-Care Sanctuary. Let's step into the expansive cathedral of our own hearts and seriously nurture ourselves.
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I'll see you there! Love, Lacy
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It all begins Oct 1. For more info bit.ly/self-caresanctuary ✨
A MUST Watch
Watched the documentary - Won't You Be My Neighbor - this weekend. It's so beautiful and worthy of your time. I was struck by so many things but sitting down tonight to write 3 are asking to be shared...
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1. He was undeniably beloved and shaped several generations and yet there were moments when he wasn't sure if he could do it or if he was helping in the way he hoped.
That's real.
We all face doubts and demons. I wish I could tell you that it goes away, that someday we wake up and feel like we're doing the best we can and it's all perfection but it feels like a condition of being human that in some form we will all have doubts along the way.
I want to remind you that you matter and being you is enough. Fred Rogers was genuine and he showed up fully himself and that certainly shaped my early years.
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2. People protested at his funeral. I couldn't believe it and I cried watching it. My heart doesn't understand division. I know people want to stand up for what they believe in but when it hurts others it just doesn't compute in my heart. That may sound so simplistic but it's what I've got. The more work I do on myself and with others the more I see that love is everything and the only thing.
I'm reading a book called Frequency right now and in it Penney Peirce says that, “Truth is love moving though the mind." Those words brought so much into alignment for me. LOVE really is all we need.
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3. As with anything in life keep what most resonates and toss the rest. I teach that and believe it’s a supportive practice. Here’s what resonated from the docu and remembering my years watching Mr. Rogers Neighborhood:
Listen.
Invite moments of silence and pause.
Speak truth.
Show kindness.
Your deep feelings are not to be feared.
You are loved and capable of loving.